60 miles. 3 days. And - with any luck - all 10 toenails.

60 miles. 3 days. And - with any luck - all 10 toenails.

Sunday, November 28, 2010

Confessions of a Klutz

The OUC Half Marathon is popular among the Orlando running community, boasting a lovely course, but also numerous sections paved with brick. I ran this race several times without incident. Nevertheless, I always approached the brick portion with a sense of impending doom.
My inner klutz, convinced I was destined to eat it, would inevitably toss out helpful warnings like, "Wow! Those bricks sure look hard! It probably would hurt if you tripped and fell right about now!"

In 2005, the prophecy was fulfilled in a dramatic way. As I hit mile 9, a particularly troublesome brick caught my toe, and I found myself unexpectedly tumbling headlong toward the sidewalk. Thinking that I needed to preserve not only my knees, but also my dignity, I threw my shoulder forward intending for my upper body to take the brunt of the fall. What resulted was a spectacular - yet sexy! - full body slam into the ground. I was left with skinned knees, bloody shins, and a multi-colored bruise that covered my left arm from shoulder to elbow. Hot. I hobbled my way through the remaining four miles feeling rueful, but not particularly surprised.

This was not the first time something like this has happened.

If there's a table leg, I'll stub my toe. If there's a crack in the sidewalk, I'll trip over it. If there's a pole, there's a strong chance I just might run into it.

I even managed to fall down the stairs in front of 400+ people at my senior social work ceremony in college. Awesome, right?

Last night I further drove home this point. While walking to catch the T, I happily (and a bit drunkenly, if I'm completely honest) chatted to my husband about my bar-hopping glory days. Apparently I am incapable of reminiscing, drinking, and walking at the same time because I stumbled over a cobblestone and took a digger. Needless to say, this did not go unnoticed by passersby. No one laughed, although I really can't say I'd blame them if they had. I probably would have.

So I'm quite sure that in the coming months I will be able to regale you with many delightful tales. Since I will be training at least part of the time on the treadmill, the possibilities really are endless.

No comments:

Post a Comment